Today is the annual day when people put out a bunch of false stories posing as news, and then have a laugh. Or as the British newspaper The Sun calls it, “Monday.”
The tradition of April Fool’s Day began back in 715 AD, when a French Monk stumbled upon invasion plans. The bloodthirsty Swiss troops, decadent after years spent hoarding their sweet chocolates, had secretly decided to sweep in and take the France’s milk in order to create even better chocolate that they could then rule the world with.
The Monk, let’s just call him Bob, discovered the nefarious plot and decided to trick the Swiss. Using their own tactics against them, Bob the Monk created hundreds of chocolate statues in the shape of the animal the Swiss view as the ultimate delicacy: the bunny. As the Swiss approached, they were lured onto a rock ledge by the sweet, sweet prospect of the confectionery, where they all fell and died. And that is how April Fool’s Day was born.
While that story is obviously completely true, there are several others floating around today that are not. Below is a list of our favorites of the day.
Blizzard Introduces the Warhound! For Every Class, because that’s Only Fair
Star Craft 2 gets an update! Sort of. The post claims that the Warhound is returning to the game after being removed from the Heart of the Swarm beta, but it caused a few balance issues. As a result, here’s what Blizzard came up with:
So after considering every angle, here’s what’s changing: • The Warhound has been added for Terran because robots are cool and the art is amazing • The Warhound has been added for Zerg to remain competitive with Terran. • The Warhound has been added for Protoss to keep Protoss players from whining about them on the forums.Dishonored Was Even More Impressive than we First Thought
The next time you play a random shooter and you are attacked by a character that looks a bit out of place in the game you are in, yet oddly familiar, it may be because of Dishonored. In this developers diary, Arkane Studios explains how the game was far, far, far more sophisticated then people first thought. For example, if you anger an NPC enough, they will hunt you down. Even if they have to leave the game and find you in another title. They’ll cut you, bro.
Eidos Montreal takes Deus Ex: Human Defiance in a Bold New Direction
There has been a lot of discussion regarding what is next for the Deus Ex series following the successful relaunch/prequel that was Deus Ex: Human Revolution. Turns out the new direction is… bold.
GameFAQs chills Nintendo Fans to the Bone
The best prank has at least a touch of truth to it, so when GameFAQs posted a poll question asking readers what they thought of EA buying Nintendo, it struck a nerve. Even the most ardent of Nintendo fans, the “Nintendo 4 life” crew that live and bleed with the Japanese pioneer, have to admit that the company isn’t doing all that well following the release of the Wii U. So while this scenario is certainly unlikely, it isn’t completely impossible. In fact, nearly 28,000 people responded with “Not funny guys, I forgot what today was, and you about gave me a heart attack.” The idea of having to pay a microtransaction fee to receive the Master Sword earlier in the game is enough to chill the blood of Zelda fans everywhere.
George Takei Defects to Star Wars
This one isn’t gaming, but it deserves a special mention. In a move that may have seriously caused harm to the Cold War-like rival fan bases of Star Trek and Star Wars, George Takei posted a picture of himself wearing Jedi robes, claiming that would be playing the role of Ceti Maru, a member of the Jedi High Council, in J.J. Abrams’ new Star Wars film. Naturally, this being the internet, Takei’s humor was undetectable and the story was soon being reported as legitimate news. Millions of voices suddenly cried out in confusion.
Guild War 2 Kicks it Old School
The dream of the 90s lives on with Guild Wars 2 and its Super Adventure box. The graphics looks rad, but’s the air guitar that really seals the deal.
It wouldn’t be April Fool’s Without a Half-Life reference
There is a new claim that Half-Life 2: Episode Three is confirmed for an October 10 release date. Of course, after years of abuse at the hands of Half-Life pranksters (i.e. Valve), this one was an obvious fake – albeit a good looking one. The site itself even appears to have the Steam address, but closer examination shows that it is missing a “dot” in the URL. Besides, Valve has already been playing the longest practical joke in gaming history on us, so this would just be redundant. To add insult to injury, adding the game to your shopping cart will take you to the real Steam page, where you’ll find a copy of Petz Catz 2 waiting for you in your shopping cart. That’s just mean.
Journey Introduces Death Match
After cleaning up in awards, thatgamecompany is apparently looking to branch out.
SEGA Wins the Day of Goat References
So this video from SEGA… Well, it’s probably easier to just watch it than to explain.
Turtle Beach Introduces Tough Love to its Headsets
When a headset can actually make a player cry, you know you have something special.
Credit for the .gif goes to DrForester